It's confession time…

This is like the “I Never” game.  Except without the alcohol.  Or embarrassing admissions.  So I guess it’s more like a confessional.  Except without the priest or the hail marys.  Yeah, it’s more like I’m just about to share with the internet a bunch of things and hope I’m not the only one..

If I haven’t mentioned it enough let me just say it one more time.  My hubby is out of town.  He’s down in North Carolina all by his lonesome.  His training today ended early and he called me from his hotel whining that he was bored.  I suggested that he find something to do – like go to the movies.  But there’s that whole “I’m all by myself” bit…

Let me share with you, dear internet, that I am shy and frequently have anxiety when dealing with new situations and new people.  I hate going places alone.  That’s why I had kids.  I read in my friend’s blog recently that she called her daughter her security blanket.  Amen!  Have to go the grocery store?  Take a kid.  Need to go buy tampons?  Take a kid.  Have an interview?  Take a kid.  That does make for an awkward situation.  I’m already dreading the fall when all three of my kids will be in school and I will be on my own.  What if I have to go somewhere? 

Sometime during my first years of college I decided to ditch my classes and go to the movies.  All by myself.  I drove to the theater and surveyed my choices.  I picked “I Know What You Did Last Summer” and headed into the theater only to find that I was the only one in attendance.  I sat with my hand clamped firmly over my mouth for the entire movie.  I was afraid that I might scream and the guy running the film would laugh.  After the movie I was so proud that I did something like that on my own.  I’m still proud.

My hubby called to tell me that he was on his way to go see a movie.  All by himself.  He’s decided to see the Will Smith flick.  Shortly after that call he texted me to say that he’s the only one in the theater.  I wonder if he’ll cover his mouth?

He’s got me beat now.  A movie and dinner… all on his own.  I don’t know that I could go that far.  He even ate dinner at a real sit down restaurant.  To me that’s more daunting.  In a theater it’s dark and everyone is focused on the film.  Well… if there is an “everyone”.  In a restaurant it’s more glaringly obvious that you’re alone.  Part of me really wants to push myself to go do it sometime.  The other part of me says “Are you crazy??  Why??”  I usually listen to that voice.

What about you?  What would you or would you not do alone?

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4 responses to “It's confession time…

  • Matthew

    I L-O-V-E love being alone. It makes me feel powerful. I don’t have to answer to anybody. This may come from being in a marriage with someone who couldn’t do anything alone and always wanted to control me.

    I have done just about everything you can do alone. Meals at nice, sit-down restaurants… Movies… Concerts… you name it, I’ve done it and loved every minute!

    SDG,
    Matty

  • littletiger

    I have to admit doing things by myself has never really been a problem for me, cuz I get the chance to meet unusual people especially when I’ve traveled overseas. My “I never” tho is really more personal – I have a really hard time admitting my feelings to others. Steve often has to work to get me to open up and admit what I’m feeling. And I never cry in front of others unless they are really close friends – and even then I have a really hard time with it.

  • zanne

    i have eaten alone, in a sit-down restaurant. i don’t like it. i do feel a bit exposed, but i also am just BORED. nothing to do but eat–nobody to talk to, not even a tv! if i have to do it again, i suspect i’ll take a book…

  • Flea

    I love going places all alone. Maybe it has something to do with homeschooling three children for nine years and ALWAYS being surrounded by them, but I can’t WAIT to get out by myself. Or have them all go away to school (YAY for public school!).

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